Yearly Archives: 2017

5 ways to overcome your marriage fear before you tie the knot

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A weird feeling of fear that surrounds couples before marriage is aptly justified. After all they are about to enter an entirely new and different phase of life, good enough a reason to pass chills down the spine. Just a few steps can help diminish you fear to the minimum.

Identify the reason for your fear

There could be a numerous reasons for this fear, but you are the only one who can identify the real reason for your fear. It is utmost important to deal with this before entering the institution of marriage and take any decision pertaining to the same. If it merely a fear of failing in something new, it can be completely overcome by simply focusing on the positives and drifting away from the negative thoughts. Be candid with your feelings and your partner. Speak up and try to find a solution together.

Discuss with those whose relationship you admire

Let other happy couples you admire be your role model. Let them give you enough reasons to start your journey fearlessly. Talk to them, let them tell you their tales and learn from their experiences. Listen to how they communicate with each other, how they love & respect each other amidst all ups and downs of life. Converse with them about your fear of marriage and take the advice they offer you. Know the lighter aspects marriage and the difficult ones too. A candid opinion form such a couple will help you sail through your emotional journey. Their insight in most probability will act like your strength and base for a happy marriage.

Understand that marriage is a roll-a-coaster

Unlike any other relationship, marriage is a roll-a-coaster that only the two are riding and no two roll-a-coasters are same. But what is common in all marriages is agreements, disagreements, arguments and make-ups. No relationship is perfect and marriage is no different. It is bound to have its own complications, imperfections and ups and downs. There will be tough times and it is all the more important to stand by each other in such times, further strengthening the relationship. Giving up on tough times is the deadly blunder some couples do end up with, spoiling their relationship and setting dreadful example for others too.

Recognize your exact expectations out of the relationship

Be clear on all your expectations and your desires from your relationship. Contemplate all matters from career, education, place of stay, children, and future prospects. Envisaging the expectations you have of your marriage will make you to feel in control of the idea of marriage and your life after marriage. Discuss all such things openly with your partner before committing for marriage. Listing your fears and expectations before committing to a relationship will help avoid surprises post marriage.

Final decision to marry should come with conviction to spend the rest of your life with same person

Don’t let anyone force you into marriage, not even your prospective partner. Listen to your own conscious and only if you are convinced about marrying him/her and spending your entire life together, is when you should actually go ahead with tying the knot.

Top 5 Winter Honeymoon Destinations in India

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Post all the hustle and bustle of Indian wedding it is finally the time to relax. Yes, the honeymoon period, which every couple looks forward to as an enticing start to a beautiful journey. Deciding on the honeymoon destination has to be a well thought of process, finalization happening post a mutual discussion, which respectfully takes into account the preferences of both partners. Here we are listing top few winter honeymoon destinations for mountain lovers, beach lovers and those who have an inclination for art & architecture.

Kashmir

Paradise on earth, as its commonly known, Kashmir is a perfect winter honeymoon destination to unwind and rekindle the flame of love for the newly-weds after long and tiring wedding ceremonies. Srinagar, Gulmarg, Pahalgam offer the perfect serene setting for honeymooners and is also less crowded than other nearby dest9inations like Shimla and Manali. An ideal honeymoon in Kashmir/ Gulmarg has to be a combo of skiing, trekking and exploring the beautiful nature sights in town.

Kerala                                       

Kerala offers a splendid mix of green tea plantations, foggy mountains, sandy beaches, backwaters and serene resorts, making it a most desirable place to visit during winter for honeymooners. Its unparalleled beauty & attraction is something you can’t afford to miss. If you are looking for a pleasant stay in midst of lush green mountains, visit Munnar. If you want to enjoy your time together on a houseboat, enjoy Kerala’s famous backwaters in Alleppey. However, there is an endless list of off-beat winter destinations like Kochi, Munnar, Wayanad and more for those who want to explore more in Kerala.

Goa

If you love beaches, Goa is undoubtedly one of the best beach destinations to visit during winters. Though this is also the peak tourist season which might make you feel lost in the crowd. Though that nowhere concludes to avoid goa as a honeymoon destination, rather suggests being a little cautious about choosing the beaches you visit in goa. Few isolated beaches like Miramar Beach, Morjim Beach (also known as Little Russia), etc. can be the best options for honeymooners, offering a harmonious ambiance echoing the local trance.

Andaman and Nicobar Islands

These islands are a bit isolated from the Indian peninsula, but they make for a perfect beach honeymoon destination. Port Blair and Havelock Island are the top tourist places in the Andaman. While Port Blair is recognized for its rich history, Havelock is a treasure trove of natural beauty. Andaman and Nicobar Islands offer a perfect and fabulous environment for a romantic honeymoon.

Rajasthan

Rajasthan is well-known for its rich heritage, art & culture, historical monuments, heritage hotels, fairs & festivals, shopping, wildlife experience and most importantly the taste of Rajasthan. Though mostly avoided in summer season due to extreme warm weather, this makes for a perfect honeymoon destination during winters for all art lovers. To top it up, a stay in a heritage hotel giving a king like feeling is a unique honeymoon experience to be cherished forever. Udaipur, Jaipur, Jodhpur, Ajmer, Ranthambore National Park are a few key places to visit in Rajasthan.

What is the perfect time to get married?

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In a typical Indian family, the parental pressure for marriage starts to build up as soon as a girl is out of college and the boy has managed to grab a job. Not denying that the parents would have their own valid reasons to get their children hooked in a marital relationship as early as they can, but there are certain facts that determine the success of the relationship. Sadly, but not all marriages are successful and there can be multiple factors that impact the success quotient in marriage. The right timing being one of the crucial factors, though there can be many others too.

There are various schools of thought sharing different opinions on the perfect time to get married. As per one study, getting married at a very young age, when you are just out of your teens, poses a little more risk to your relationship. That is for a simple reason that the couple has not yet reached a maturity level to handle the fragilities of marital relationship. Initial attractions might be good enough to make butterflies run through your stomach, but the sincerity to nurture the relationship is somewhere missing in the whole picture.

Another theory says that people in their 30s or 40s who have already spent a significant span of time alone, at their own will and terms, have difficulties in adjusting with a new person in their life and accept a new unknown family as their own. This holds more true to women, as the level of adjustment post marriage is more at women’s end when compared to men. Though it does not defies the applicability of this on both men and women.

That leaves people with a short range of time believed to be the perfect time for marriage, starting form about mid-twenties to thirty and close. It makes sense to start a lifelong relationship with someone in this age range, as at this age people are old enough to understand if they really get along with someone or are just blinded by hormones. They have somehow settled in career and have already made few significant life choices and taken on some responsibilities, making them prepared for taking up a accountability for their married life. And they may be financially stable enough to be able to contemplate supporting someone should the need arise.

All this said, still it depends on an individual’s perception on marriage and the way he/she would want to lead the life. A perfect answer to “What is the perfect time to get married?” is – when YOU find YOUR PERFECT MATCH and you feel you are ready to take up the responsibility of marriage. The best thing you can do is to honor a great match when you’re lucky enough to find one. An year or two here or there would not make much a difference, but all that matters is the reflection of love and respect for each other, compatibility in terms of values and what you both want to achieve as individuals as well as a couple.

12 Signs you know you’ve found your Perfect Match

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Marriages are made in heaven, they say, but love is grown and cherished on this planet. Love happens while we are busy making other plans. In a spur of moments, our life changes and we experience something blissful, something pure, and something selfless. Even love comes with its signs and symptoms, check for yourself if you are in the barometer or not.

1. When he/she understands you without your explanations
Sometimes even when words fail, facial expressions give it away. The person you intend to spend your life with should trust you and to make you understand that this relationship work wonders. Your search for the perfect match would definitely end at the matrimonial sites over the Internet. 

2. When he/she is the first person you think of every morning and every night
Those soft words, cuddles, and long talks day and night tickle your love buds, causing you fall for the person harder. No morning or night feel complete without them or their presence.

3. When you don’t hide any secrets
Your every minor intricate detail would be shared with your better half just so they don’t miss out on any part of your life. Where every minute thing is shared, love blossoms making the two grow closer to each other.

4. When you share your personal space willingly
You find no need to separate your space with your loved one as you consider him/her as a part of your life. Your inner sanctum includes your love as well, making your picture complete and perfect.

5. When you are respected by him/her
Your lifestyle, thoughts, and views are keenly observed and accepted by your perfect match. You find easy to talk your mind without being judged. For those still on their search of a perfect match, go to the Indian Matrimonial sites and end your search.

6. When your decisions matter to him/her
Those smallest words uttered by you are comprehended, thought about, and analyzed to be implemented. You are treated as an equal by appreciating your decisions, even on trivial issues.

7. When he/she does the things they dislike, only for you
Your choices matter to him/her and even if they don’t like or love it, they try it to see you happy. All the weird things are done just to see you smile. Find those alike, yet different people on the matrimonial sites.

8. When he/she ask for your day
Even after a rough day, he/she ask for your schedule and mood of the day and do everything possible thing to lighten it up.

9. When little sacrifices don’t matter for some quality time
Your favorite movie is in theatres and your better half doesn’t like watching movies, then you prefer time spent not your indulgences. And same from the other side.

10. When he/she takes small efforts to make you smile
Your days of turmoil and uneasiness are not spent alone, you always have unwavering support from the other end. He/she tries every possible thing to make you feel good about yourself as he/she cannot see you sad. The same goes for the other half.

11. When he/she makes you feel special
No specific occasion is required for him/her to make you feel wanted. They make the most of every moment to let you enjoy this beautiful life in a simple yet lovely way. Search your special one online through the best matrimonial sites. You never know you might the right Indian bride or groom for yourself.

12. When he/she says sorry irrespective of anyone’s fault
They apologize for the betterment of the relationship and for its proper functioning. They never seek to contemplate the wrongs of their relationships, they maintain a healthy balance amidst the chaos.

Fears that surround couples before marriage

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For any young girl or boy in marriageable age, the word “marriage” is sure to shower a beam of excitement. It is worth a mention here that this excitement is most of the times accompanied by an unexplained fear. The family, surroundings, social circle, individual state, personality and many more factors club together to craft an opinion about marriage and related extents. A positive environment develops an optimistic view about marriage whereas negative environment or some undesirable experiences develop a pessimistic view about marriage leading to fear factor.

The common fears that usually haunt a person before getting married revolve around either of the below:

Fear of unacceptance

Two strangers who have not even known each other till a few days back and now they are proceeding with a lifelong commitment to stand by each other in all ups and downs of life. The fear of your partner accepting you with all your good and not so good qualities is quite justified. Not only this, but there is another layer of acceptance that matters – acceptance by in-laws, which is again a big concern of fear.

Fear of partner cheating on you

Even when couples get to spend time with each other during the courtship period, still there is a probability for either of them not disclosing or revealing all the instances from their past. Any previous crush or affair that might have been a serious one or has a tendency to bloom into a serious one, might not be discussed openly. Such fears do haunt a soon to be married person.

Fear of marriage failure

Failure in marriage for any reasons whatsoever is the most devastating thing that can ever happen to a couple. Even when everything is going as per your expectations, still there remains an undefined fear of unexpected that can mar your happiness.

Fear of emulating marriage of a known family member (distance, fights, missing love & respect)

Being a witness to any adverse marital relationship in the known social circle is confirmed to act as a seedling to the fear of your marriage being an emulation of theirs. Though each couple is unique and every marriage is distinct from the rest, still the mind hovers around speculating a resemblance with others and giving rise to futile fear.

And the fear of the unknown (What will marriage be like? How will things shape up after marriage? and what not)

As a basic human tendency, we always tend to fear about what’s not known to us. Yes, the Fear of Unknown. For a person tying the nuptial bond, there is a whole lot of new world that’s about to open up post marriage. The new world, which is unique to every couple and no one can give you a clue about how things will shape up for you post marriage. Its like you need to jump in deep waters to taste it.

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